


DLC: Rise

by ivorytower



Series: Fun With Dirk And Jane [3]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/F, F/M, Fun With Dirk & Jane, Fun With Esoteric Concepts, M/M, Multi, NO NOT THAT ONE THE OTHER ONE
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-08
Updated: 2021-02-23
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:07:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,098
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27958874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ivorytower/pseuds/ivorytower
Summary: On the heels of their victory against Caliborn and the Empress, a pair of mysterious figures appear to explain some of the mysterious happenings of the Session, all the while gearing up to fight Doc Scratch (who isn't dead) and the First Guardian imbued Carapacians who threaten the peace so tenuously obtained.
Relationships: Dave Strider/Karkat Vantas, Jeff Strider/John Egbert/Jade Harley, Jeff Strider/Rose Lalonde (past), Kris Strider/Roxy Lalonde, Rose Lalonde/Kanaya Maryam, dirk strider/jane crocker/jake english
Series: Fun With Dirk And Jane [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/69730
Comments: 2
Kudos: 2





	1. Chapter 1

**Thank you for purchasing Rise. Downloading now... Finished! Commence playing?**

**[Yes]**

_ First Guardian. _

__

__

_ “Hey,” Dirk asks, and he stalks towards them, footsteps echoing in the vault. “Who the fuck are you?” _

“Peace, Prince of Heart,” the First Guardian says, holding up hands that seem entirely human. I watch him. I’ve seen First Guardians before. GCat and Doc Scratch, both infinite and terrible in their way. This one seems different. “My name is Claret, and as you surmised, I am a First Guardian. This is my companion, Cesi. We mean you no harm. We’ve been observing your Session.”

“We’re not stalkers,” Cesi adds in cheerfully. “It’s literally our job to observe Sessions and make sure they’re going according to plan. Which is a very, very broad job description, given how the propagation of universes goes, and you’ve done well here. Better than we could have dreamed. You’ve survived the terrible trials you’ve faced and we’re both very proud of you.”

“We didn’t ask for you to be proud of us,” Rose says, her fingers curled tightly around a wand that pulses darkly. “We didn’t ask for you to be here at all. We’ve all had more than enough so-called First Guardian interference to last a lifetime. Several lifetimes, in fact.”

“Oh, Rose...” Cesi steps closer, and her expression is gentle, kind. “I know that you’ve been hurt before. You were used by someone who hurt you very badly. You weren’t alone, he hurt Terezi, Kanaya, Jane, and Jake. He even hurt Vriska, though I know that’s hard to see right now.”

Rose presses her dark-tinted lips together, and her eyes flash purple. “There’s no need to treat me like a child. I’m very much an adult now.”

“You are, of that there’s no doubt.” Cesi’s kind expression doesn’t waver. “But we treat adults kindly too, especially given what you’ve all been through. You’re worried about Calliope, and Scratch, and the Carapacians who have come into the power of the Green Sun.”

“Yeah, so it would be extremely helpful of you to explain yourselves,” Dirk says, his tone dangerous, but slightly less hostile. “Also, you don’t look like a First Guardian.”

“I’m not, but as a God Tier Seer of Space, my powers are adjacent to theirs,” Cesi says, cheerful. “And I’m the one addressing this because it sounds like you’re going to stab Claret, which we’d both prefer you didn’t do. It wouldn’t kill him, but it  **would** be very annoying.”

“Jegus forbid you be annoyed,” Karkat mutters. “You’re a rustblood, but not one I recognize. How... which Session are you from?”

“The one that Dawn was from.” Cesi’s expression grows sad. “It was... complicated, and messy, but in the end we succeeded. We created our own, precious universe. With what happened to Dawn, and the others, I... well, it was easy to accept Claret’s offer to join him rather than take my place in the next universe.”

“...and because you’re sleeping together,” Rose notes, and I blink. Claret makes a soft, choked noise.

Cesi grins. “Also, because we’re sleeping together, yes. He’s also been known to obtain items for our house, and ask my opinion as to where they should be placed in the home.”

“In fairness,” Roxy drawls. “It’s a  **nice** house. I’ve seen it, though not for very long.”

“We know,” Claret says, frowning. “Which will be addressed in good time.”

“Be that as it may,” Dirk says, trying to drag us back on topic. “We were getting an explanation.”

“You were, yes,” Claret says, speaking up. He looks curious and too-perfect, but only resembles Doc Scratch very basically. He’s mostly human, aside from his strange colouring, and he meets my gaze with a slight smile. He feels old, and weary, and sad, but not malevolent and ancient the way Scratch did. “Do not fear, Maid of Life, I have no intention of seeing you break your promise.”

“No one likes a mind reader, but I do appreciate that,” I say. “So... very well, let us have your explanation.”

“Should we maybe go back to the house?” Roxy asks. “Not that it ain’t fun to stand around on this eyesore of a vault, but it might be nice to like, sit or somethin’.”

“I can take us there,” Jade says, and her ears wiggle briefly. “Or I guess Claret can teleport us too, huh.”

“You do it,” Rose says, and glares at Claret. “I trust you.”

“Sure thing, Rose!” Jade makes shooing motions and we all stand together. John changes outfits rapidly, to something with no blood on it, and Dirk and Jake do the same. It’s a shame, I think they both look fantastic in their little outfits. At least  **they** have colour. My outfit is  **taupe.**

Jade teleports us back to our house, and our guests cram onto the couches we have, and some people need to share. Kris’ gaze goes dull for a moment, and he creates a few more couches, setting them down so we can all get comfortable.

Dirk, Jake, and I settle onto our usual couch, and I thread my fingers into the blanket. It feels knitted, though it’s a little too uniform and smooth to be truly made by hand. I can’t knit to save my life, but Dirk’s thinking about giving it a try. On the couch opposite ours, Jeff and Jade sit, and John sits between them, a barrier or a link, perhaps. Dave and Karkat get their own loveseat, a copy of the one Roxy and Kris used, and there’s another for Rose and Kanaya, and a final couch for Terezi, Sollux, and Gamzee.

Instead of couches, Cesi and Aradia receive high stools to avoid crushing their delicate, gauzy red butterfly wings, and they make themselves comfortable.

Claret isn’t given a seat at all, and he frowns slightly, but doesn’t comment. “I will begin at the beginning, with the Green Sun. You knew her once as Calliope, but she was always the Green Sun. As the Muse of Space, she is the ultimate passive class, contrasting her brother, the Lord of Time. Rather than destroying Space and Time, the way he was doing, she doesn’t just heal reality, she holds it together.”

“That sounds almost like Life, not Space,” I say. “Though I suppose you would know better than I would.”

“While Life certainly is about healing, it is primarily about struggle and endurance. You struggle, you strive, and you mend. In her case, she is the guardian of the very fabric of reality. Space, in the Aspect sense, isn’t just about outer space, but about distance, velocity, size, and location.”

“It is also about creating a universe,” Kanaya says. “Jade and I both completed the Genesis Frog. The one I created with Karkat led to the universe she was part of, and then she created a frog in turn. We do not yet know what that universe will be like.”

“Every universe is very different, unique and special,” Claret says, and his expression clouds briefly. “Each one lives and dies adjacent to the others, though not layered on top of one another like alternate and doomed timelines.”

“So there’s not, like, a Dave in every universe, just one in all the timelines for this universe?” Dave asks, slouched on the couch next to Karkat and Terezi. “There’s no me in the universe Cesi’s from?”

“That’s correct!” Cesi says, fluttering her wings. She leans forward a little, towards his voice, and leers. “Trust me, I’d  **remember** you.”

Dave, to my surprise, blushes.

“I am a First Guardian from a planet of that universe, though I was not the Guardian for Cesi’s world,” Claret says, calling our attention back to him. “That was someone else, though you would not know them. When the time came, the trolls participated in a Session with assistance from some humans, as well as some others. It was... complicated.”

“From what I understand, every Session is complicated,” Kris says. “One third of all Sessions fail, and if it was anything like ours, or the ones that led to ours, it was filled with teenage drama and poor life choices.”

“Like letting you talk to people,” Dirk mutters, though he doesn’t mean it. He leans into Jake a little, and I brush my fingers over his hand. “But... you said that Dawn was the Blue Star. What does that mean, exactly?”

“In the place that she was from, she had a psychic gift that was powerful and extremely rare,” Cesi says. “She was a Wishgranter. Hence the odd human poetry and the ability to create things from thin air. Though, her powers are limited too. She can only create things that are  ** possible  ** and someone’s greatest desire. Not exactly a combat-ready skill, but we managed.”

“She got Calliope her Quest Bed from a version of Prospit that probably didn’t exist in a Session that was utterly doomed to begin with,” Karkat says. “I feel like being about to get whatever the fuck you want is a pretty good combat skill.”

“True, but it’s not as easy to harness as just hitting someone with a sword, or with mind lasers,” Cesi says. “There was more to it than that. A great evil that used the opportunity to try to escape. Not entirely different from what happened to all of you, but smaller in scope. The important part, despite how it felt at that time, wasn’t what happened with Dusk, or the Maial, or blowing up Nale’s ghost-mom with a landmine--”

“I’m sorry  ** what?” **

“--but that Dawn was always meant to be the Blue Star. Her existence spans over multiple universes, multiple  ** realities,  ** and in a similar fashion to that, so is Calliope the Green Sun, and has always been the Green Sun. She is the mother of all First Guardians, endowing them with power and giving them their purpose.”

“I’m glad that means Callie won’t be alone,” Roxy wipes at her eyes. “I’m glad that after all she went through, she’s happy, yanno?”

“My experience with communing with the Green Sun is a positive one, normally speaking,” Claret says. “Though it is impossible for her to intervene directly in anything that happens once a First Guardian has been created.”

“Which is why she can’t take away power from the Jacks, or from Scratch,” Dave says. “So, like, what was the deal with that bomb?”

“It’s literally impossible to use a bomb to blow up a sun, even one created in a Session,” Cesi says. “A sun  ** is  ** a bomb, a huge, continuous one. The only thing that tends to kill suns is other suns, or black holes which  ** used  ** to be suns, and even then, those are just normal, every-day suns. Not gigantic magical suns at the centre of all existence.”

“I am aware that we were played for fools,” Rose says crisply. “You don’t need to rub it in.”

“We’re not rubbing it in,” Claret says, trying to keep his voice gentle. “Scratch manipulated you, used you. You had no reason to think that he was pushing you into a series of causal loops that would lead into the genesis of both the Green Sun and Grand Entropy. Your world understands gods very differently. Even those who live with them.”

John reaches up and rubs his fingers along Jade’s ears. I glance at Jeff, who looks like he wants to put an arm around Jade, but can’t. I seem to recall there was something of a failed relationship in that mix. Something to resolve, then, before we move on to the new universe.

“I’m sorry, the  ** what?”  ** Dirk asks. “Are you telling me we fucked up the very fabric of reality by not dying?”

“Oh, no, not at all,” Claret says, holding out his hands. “In a similar fashion to how Calliope was always meant to be the Green Sun, but she has a physical body she used to communicate with her friends, eat food, sleep, and ultimately be murdered in, so too did Caliborn do many, many different, often terrible things before he was able to achieve the state of being known as Grand Entropy.”

“I stole...” Jeff begins. “I mean, what we  ** all  ** saw is whatever Caliborn became. He died and stayed dead. Is that going to screw things up? I mean--”

“No, not at all,” Claret says, and glances at me. Honestly, you turn yourself into a lich  ** one  ** time... “Calliope was also dead, a ghost. She still had a purpose and a function. Aradia started her Session dead and is now alive.”

“And loving it!”

“Some of you have also experienced the dream bubbles that Feferi Peixes created whilst a ghost, which have now always existed and have spread throughout all Sessions, past and future. In them, you have met ghosts of people who at some point were linked to Sessions for this universe and its progeny, though not ghosts of the progeny of other universes.” Claret gestures. “Piercing the barrier between universes is complicated, and mostly well-suited to those like myself and Cesi, though First Guardians usually don’t venture outside their own universe.”

“So, being dead isn’t just nothing,” Dave says, and bounces his knee briefly. “Hey, do you know if--”

“He didn’t participate in the Session,” Claret says. “So, I’m afraid not. There also aren’t ghosts for Game pieces, like the Carapacians. The ghosts that linger are only for dead participants in the current Session or all participants in doomed timelines. With one notable exception.”

He nods to Jeff, who looks away. I clear my throat.

“While that’s all very fascinating, what does that have to do with Caliborn?” I ask. “You used a term earlier that I hope you will define for those of us not in the know.”

“It means that, dead or alive, he’s still doing what he’s supposed to be doing!” Cesi says cheerfully. “All universes die. All people cease to exist. Planets, suns, First Guardians, all of us will eventually be so much cosmic dust. Such is the concept of entropy.”

“Just as Calliope is the ultimate creator, so too is Caliborn the ultimate destroyer,” Claret says. “But entropy is not a murderer. It doesn’t charge through timelines shattering and destroying everything. It’s slow, it is the ultimate victor in any conflict, but deliberately stunting the growth of all existence is anathema. He will balance his sister, and she will balance him, twining around each other forever, just as Dawn is the dream and Dusk is the nightmare.”

“Don’t get too meta on them, love,” Cesi says warningly. “Otherwise, we’ll never get to the point of the discussion.”

“You’re right, we’ve veered off-topic,” Claret says, and takes a breath. “We’re here to talk about Scratch, and the Carapacians that have been tainted by the First Guardian’s powers.”

“If you don’t mind me asking, maybe we can start with talking about what a First Guardian actually  ** is,”  ** Kris says. “Since that would probably help us. We’ve only ever known GCat, Scratch, and...”

“Beq,” Jade says softly. “His name was Bequerel, and I didn’t know he was a First Guardian, just that he was  ** my  ** guardian, and my best friend.”

“Of course,” Claret says, and begins. “I and my kin watch over different worlds scattered throughout the universes, as created by the Green Sun for that purpose. Each of us possess near-omniscience and near-omnipresence, as you are acquainted with.”

“Scratch spoke of blind spots, blanks in his vision,” Kanaya says. “Was that a lie he told us, or was it true?”

“It’s true,” Claret says, and his expression shadows. “It’s all too true that we have blind spots. More than we care to admit, fewer than those who deal with us might like.”

“Scratch’s were those cue balls, like the one Rose had.” Jade looks over at her as she says it. “It wasn’t the best thing for us to get our hands on.”

“Different First Guardians have different weaknesses. In his case, he liked to take on the trappings of a fortune teller, a seer of the future and the past, though much of what he did was make guesses and psychoanalyze people who had far more limited understandings than he.”

“That’s not as comforting as you think it is,” Rose says sourly, and Kanaya pats her hand.

\-- ectoBiologist [EB] begins pestering stolenSanctity [SS] at ??? --

EB: hey jeff uh  
EB: maybe we should talk?  
SS: yeah we should  
SS: kinda wish we could do it privately but i guess we’re still being heroes so here we go.  
SS: if you ever pull that shit again i’m going to kill you.  
EB: i had to!  
EB: it was the only thing that made sense  
EB: everyone was getting hurt and i couldnt let anyone else die  
SS: but it’s okay for *you* to die?  
EB: no, not really but  
EB: look, when my dad died i just didn’t understand at first  
EB: it was different with nanna egbert because she had always been dead as far as i was concerned  
EB: but when the session started i spent most of it either fighting monsters or looking for my dad  
EB: or rose  
EB: and you know what happened to rose  
SS: i do yeah  
EB: i kind of wandered around not sure what to do for a long time  
EB: and i cant help but think that because of the mistakes that i made that i got people killed  
EB: that-jade for sure and you-you and that-rose and maybe everyone in that universe?  
EB: all because i didnt know what i was doing at all  
SS: look i get it  
EB: no i dont think you do  
EB: i wasnt trained to fight like you and dave  
EB: im not a fantastical sorcerer like rose  
EB: im not even a good programmer  
SS: john you don’t  
EB: but what i *am* is a prankster  
EB: and i pulled off the greatest prank of all time on caliborn  
EB: my pranksters gambit is through the roof  
EB: i *won*  
EB: so don’t worry too much  
EB: because i have *you* to help me when im in trouble  
EB: just like always  
SS: you’re a big dork, john  
EB: :B

\-- ectoBiologist [EB] ceases pestering stolenSanctity [SS] at ??? --


	2. Chapter 2

“So, does every planet have a First Guardian?” Jake asks. “What about Mars? Jupiter?”

“Why does a planet need a guardian at all?” Claret asks. “What--”

“No, we’re not doing this,” Rose says harshly. “We’re not doing this ‘answer a question with a question’ bullshit. We can figure it out on our own.”

Claret blinks, but nods his head once. “By all means, reason it out amongst yourselves.”

“Why does anyone need a guardian?” Jane asks. “Because they aren’t strong enough to take care of themselves. Something about their life is lacking; age, strength, wisdom, even money. We all had guardians, and in some cases, when we lost one, another would replace them.”

“...not all of us,” Jake murmurs, and Dirk grips him more tightly. “But you’re right. Children need guardians, so... what is a child to a First Guardian?”

“A planet’s worth of people,” Jade says, and bounces a little. “You protect them and keep them safe, the way Beq kept me safe, even if it was also kind of **isolating** being stuck on my island until the Game started.”

“First Guardians are not meant to take such a direct hand in the protection of their charges,” Claret says carefully. “We’re meant to protect our assigned worlds from certain existential threats. Such as alien invasions.”

“Wait, wait wait,” Kris says, waving his hand briefly. “Alien invasions? Is that the reason the Fermi Paradox exists? It’s not that there isn’t anything out there, it’s that **you’re** keeping them away?!”

“Not me specifically,” Claret reminds us. “But yes, that’s correct. Threats and invaders are diverted elsewhere until a world can fend for itself.”

“Threats like us,” Karkat says. “The Troll Empire spanned star systems. Our entire way of life was based around the idea that we would go up into space, fight aliens, kill them, and take their stuff. The things our ancestors were tangled up in, including mine.”

“So, the First Guardians weren’t doing a great job there, were they?” Rose asks, and Claret looks at her sharply. “Since I believe the trolls were an alien threat?”

“Hey, maybe be cool a little?” I say and I don’t have shades to hide my eyes, but then, neither does she. She doesn’t need a sword, shitty or otherwise, because Rose glares daggers. “Claret’s telling a story.”

“This is approximately as cool as I’m going to get with one of **his** kind around, so get used to it,” Rose snaps. Looking at her... I didn’t expect it to hurt so much. She’s not **my** Rose, just as I’m not **her** Dave. I’m only barely getting used to all of the changes, I haven’t even examined this one. Neither has Dave, I suspect.

“So, uh, the alien threat?” Roxy asks. “Rose’s right that if the First Guardians were supposed to be protecting us from them, that’s not what we saw when we were gettin’ attacked by **actual** aliens.”

Claret nods to her. “You’re right, and the reason that the trolls were so successful at invading other worlds and killing or assimilating their inhabitants is that Scratch was killing their First Guardians and absorbing their powers.”

It’s so silent I feel like I can hear Kris’ mechanical parts, my own heartbeat, and nothing else. Aradia’s wings flutter. We all look at Claret, whose expression hasn’t changed, like he just drops conversational bombs on people all the time.

“I...” Jane begins. “How? How is such a thing possible?”

“First Guardians, like everyone else, can die,” Cesi says, and her tone is so gentle, so **reasonable** that it blows my mind. “The process is very... personal, but the short version is that a First Guardian can **choose** to die, usually prompted by something very terrible happening to their people.”

“...like, having them get wiped out by aliens,” Kris finishes. “But, how are they getting wiped out if their First Guardian is protecting them in the first place?”

“Distraction, deception... all out war,” Claret says, and spreads his hands. “There are also First Guardians who lost their people for other reasons, reasons that don’t necessarily have to do with invasions. First Guardians who are forced to stand aside and watch while such things happen. Not every race is meant to survive.”

“...First Guardians like yourself?” Jane guesses, and Claret stills, looking at her. He’s silent for a long time, but Jane doesn’t look away or back down.

“Something like that, yes,” Claret says eventually. “Before Scratch learned how, First Guardians who had lost their charges would often choose to die, rather than reforming within the heart of the Green Sun. It was tragic and terrible, but understandable. The power granted to them was reabsorbed, or dispersed. Scratch learned how to force that process, and absorb it for himself.”

“That’s... horrifying,” Jane says, shaking her head. “And terrible, and tragic.”

“I have to assume the Empress was involved as well,” Dirk says. “She mind-controlled Jade, and GCat. She tried to do it to Jane. She was the perfect evil minion: she was the leader of a race basically custom-built to conquer other races. No offense.”

“You’re actually completely correct,” Terezi says, and I look over at her. “I talked to some of our Dancestors, and what they told me was that their society used to be completely different than ours. They didn’t have lusii. They had _parents._ They had a hierarchy based on social responsibility where the highest castes cared for the lower castes.”

“Which, let me tell you, is really fuckin’ patronizing,” Sollux puts in. “It’s pretty cool to **say** ‘we’re going to take care of the people below us’, but you’re still treatin’ people like they’re **lower** than you.”

“I guess that depends how you feel about it,” Jane says. “On Earth, we had programs to help the poor. Other countries had healthcare that took care of everyone without individuals having to pay for care every time they needed something. We sent money to our governments in the form of taxes with the promise they would use it to find contractors to build bridges and fix roads. That it would pay for children to go to school. I don’t think anything like that is shameful.”

“On the other hand, there’s something called ‘noblesse oblige’,” Rose says. “It means ‘required nobility’. Someone who was of a higher social status would be required to look after their lessers, which in turn **justified** the existence of their caste. ‘We are nobles who have duties, and because we have duties, we have rights’.”

“I still don’t want anyone reachin’ their benevolent frond out to take care of me,” Sollux says. “I take care of myself.”

“Don’t you think it’s possible you feel that way because of the society you grew up in?” Terezi asks him. “The society that our Dancestors came from was shattered by their Scratch, remade into a world where we **don’t** have parents and the highest castes oppress the lower ones. I didn’t get the chance to ask, but there may have been other differences too.”

“I can think of at least one,” Cesi says, almost to herself. “But never mind that for the moment.”

“Hey, here’s a question,” Dave says. “So, the old-trolls lived in a society that wasn’t perfect, but sucked way less than what you grew up in--”

“Hey, fuck you.”

“Laters.” Dave looks at me, then doesn’t. “--but after they Scratched their Session, it completely changed things. Did that happen with our Scratch?”

“As far as I can tell, not at all,” Jane says. “Obviously, the difference came slightly later given that the Rebranding happened about two years after your Session would have started, but our society wasn’t fundamentally changed. Not like that.”

“Meenah said she got the idea to Scratch from someone else,” Karkat says. “Also, all the Dancestors said they only had one moon, a pink one. No green one.”

“Damara told me that she was raised on the green moon, by Scratch,” Aradia says, fluttering her wings. “Our Ancestor was the Handmaid, the servant to Caliborn himself. The Handmaid was to fight the Empress, and when she lost, it would be so the Empress could become Caliborn’s new servant... and she’d be immortal.”

Karkat rolls his eyes. “I feel like if Meenah had been immortal, she would have bragged about it more.”

“Was she actually?” Jane wonders. “This Meenah, I mean. I don’t suppose there’s any way to ask...”

“I’m putting something together, here,” Kris says. “Just as a question, since she was a player, what Class and Aspect did Meenah have?”

“Thief of Life,” Karkat says. “Feferi was a Witch of-- oh, hold the fucking handheld communication device.”

“Vriska found an old journal belonging to **her** ancestor that seemed to indicate that the Empress could steal life from others, though she couldn’t use it to actually heal or bring back the dead,” Terezi says. “If it’s the same thing...”

“I think that’s exactly it,” Kris says. “Look, Dirk said before that the trolls were **custom made** to conquer other races. What if they literally were? What if when the Scratch happened -- and don’t think I haven’t noticed that we **Scratch** to restart a universe and their First Guardian is **Doc Scratch** \-- and Scratch influenced that change. Flipped the society completely upside down. Benevolent assistance becomes malevolent oppression.”

“My Ancestor -- and Tavros’, apparently -- both started movements that caused revolutions,” Karkat says. “Massive crackdowns. In fact, after the Summoner was put down, that’s what started the ban on adults living on Alternia, except for the Jades, I guess.”

“How were you raised instead?” Kris asks, in a tone that only barely hides that he thinks he knows the answer already. “You mentioned lusii?”

“Lusii are monsters,” Karkat says, shrugging. “After we leave the Brooding Caverns, assuming we survive, we get chosen by a lusus. I got lucky, I actually had one. Mutants don’t usually, and even then... there are always more kids than lusii. And not all kids can handle the lusus they do pick.”

“That sounds awful,” Jane says. “I can’t even what it would be like to start your life already having to fight for it.”

“Dear, people tried to kill you when you were ten,” Jake murmurs, his hand coming up to stroke the back of her neck. Jane makes a soft noise, and everyone else just kinda stares at her. “Anyway, I think I know what you mean. I saw monsters of various kinds on my island. Flocks of tinkerbulls, gigantic insects, some odd goat-fish thing. Fortunately, Dirk’s robot would keep some of them at bay... when it wasn’t in the middle of kicking my ass.”

Kris coughs slightly, which is extra-fake because of being part-robot, and says, “I believe that was part of the Empress’ not-entirely-secret plan to take over Earth.”

“She wanted to remake it for trolls, even though the trolls kept dying every time she tried to make more,” Dirk says. “It was probably because she also had a version of her lusus on the planet, though if it was her old one or a new one, I don’t know.”

“Oh, you just mean the thing that **fuckin’ killed me** ,” Sollux says, and his face screws up. “Yeah, no great loss there. It can **stay** in that universe for all I care.”

“You may want to do something about that, if you want your planet back,” Cesi says cheerfully. “The Empress put a lot of time and effort into cultivating a new lusus. Maybe send her back home? She’s probably lonely and scared.”

“That **would** explain it,” Dirk muses, and I look over at him. “From my -- and Roxy’s and Kris’ -- perspective while the world was devoid of human life aside from us, and troll life in general, it was still an intact world.”

“When we went into the Game, our world was destroyed entirely,” Rose says, frowning thoughtfully. “From what I understand, it would eventually be the home of our exiles, carapacians who spoke to us and gave us commands through various stations, places that existed on our world but were buried deeply. The circle has no beginning.”

“Yup, it’s pretty ridiculous,” Cesi says. “But, on the other hand, it’s shaped because of the decisions you made, and not because of predestination. Essentially, the timeline is like a big book. If you skip to the end, yeah you know what happens, but that doesn’t mean you didn’t have choices along the way. It just means that the story was written with those choices in mind.”

“Fate is what you make,” Dirk murmurs, quoting from some old movie. He looks pretty pleased with himself. “So, about our planet..?”

“It’s still there,” Cesi says. “Still flooded, still full of monsters, though the drones should be gone. Never liked drones, personally.”

“I’m not a fan either, given that they killed me,” Roxy drawls. “So... how do we get it back? How do we find it?”

“The Empress must have had some way to get there,” Jane says. “When I was on Prospit, I found that teleporter. Jake found it too, clearly, given that I saw him.”

“It was inside the ruins of the Frog Temple,” Jake says. “I must admit, I didn’t think too much about the consequences of my actions, I just... went through, and there I was.”

“You could have been killed,” Dirk says sternly, and squeezes his hand. “I’m glad that you weren’t, though Jane...”

“It wasn’t the first time I had died,” she says, smiling slightly, like it’s a private joke. I mean, given everything we’ve been through, maybe it is. “So, we’d go to Prospit, go through the transportalizer, then be back on Earth... then what?”

“I could shrink it!” Jade says. “I shrunk our Battlefield and our planets to bring here, so I can easily bring the flooded version of Earth back, but... what would we do with it? It’s got monsters on it and no land, right? That might work for extremely early life forms, but not for complex ones.”

“What about--”

“No Kevin Costner!” Jade says. “Not even _Troll_ Kevin Costner!”

“You’ll need it to complete the cycle,” Claret says. “The... book, as Cesi described it, is much, much longer than you might realize. Earth A, as we’ll call it, has a destiny to fulfill. You’ll want to use it as your base. Also, while you are undoubtedly very talented, your lands and battlefield are both significantly smaller and less complex than a true planet. You’ll need something to store it in.”

“This is like when we stuck the Tumour in John’s dad’s wallet modus, right?” Dave says. He glances over at me, and I shrug. “Though, fucked if I know where that is.”

“Does it have to be _his_ Wallet Modus?” Jane asks. “Because I still have _my_ father’s version, we used it for quite some time to store particularly heavy game objects to turn into grist. I could just give Jade that, she and Jake could go back to Earth and, ah, obtain it, and off we go.”

“I could send the Empress’ lusus back to the Furthest Ring, too,” Jade says. “Just in case even its tiniest squeaks would be too much glub for the trolls.”

“Not that I think it’s a bad idea, in theory, but wouldn’t there be some concern about the lusus population without the presence of its alpha predator?” Rose asks slowly. She seems, finally, less angry and more thoughtful. “Not that I want to suggest that the trolls should be in danger, but what happens when lusii become so common they can’t be stopped.”

“Gl’bgolyb didn’t exist as a control mechanism for lusii, they were just the only things she could safely consume,” Terezi says. “Feferi fed her the bare minimum she could get away with, and she had help from Eridan, Vriska, and I. Before that, it’s not clear how she survived. Probably through meals of opportunity given that she didn’t actually seem to move.”

“That’s good to hear, I suppose,” Rose says. “However, knowing all that, how are we supposed to move it without it killing us, or the trolls, or anyone else? Can Jade move it that fast?”

“No,” Cesi says. “No one can move it that fast, not even us, if we were allowed to. You’d have to talk her into it.”

“How are we supposed to do that?” Karkat asks rustily. “The one person who I could trust to talk to her is dead.”

“Dead, but not gone,” Cesi says. She claps her hands together as we all sit up. “Who wants to bring back the dead?”

\-- celestialAugur [CA] begins pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] at ??? --  
  
CA: ~ hello, rose. its nice to see you in person ~  
TT: I was under the impression that you couldn’t see at all.  
TT: Given that you were blind.  
CA: ~ *laughs* ~  
CA: ~ its true! i am blind so i cannot see ~  
CA: ~ but we are also in the presence of one another so regardless of my visual senses i am glad to see you ~  
TT: Well, when you put it that way, it’s extremely difficult for me to feel deeply unnerved by the fact we’re having this conversation in the first place.  
CA: ~ :3 ~  
TT: What do the ~’s mean?  
CA: ~ it means im speaking telepathically or at least manipulating the chat client with telepathy ~  
CA: ~ if you really want to get into it and lets face it as a seer you absolutely do i am using telekinetic powers to hit keys on a keyboard within my perception to communicate over the chat client ~  
TT: Wow. Can I learn to do that?  
CA: ~ are you psychic outside of the powers granted to you by skaia? ~  
TT: No.  
CA: ~ then im afraid not ~  
TT: Drat.  
CA: ~ on the plus side your society doesnt have a hemocaste system that dictates that some people are oppressed abused and enslaved solely based on blood colour ~  
TT: No, instead we did it based on skin colour and a sense of smug superiority.  
CA: ~ hey-o ~  
TT: How do you even know to make that reference?  
CA: ~ i can perceive the whole of existence between my own powers and those of my husbands ~  
CA: ~ and there arent as many crises as you might think even though they are all going on simultaneously ~  
CA: ~ so i get bored a lot :( ~  
TT: A shame. So, how can I help you?


End file.
